Welcome back once
again to my story of my life with CMT. Today I am going to go over
the years between my graduating from High School up until I gave
birth to my son. This is probably not going to be a long post for
there wasn't much about this time that really stuck out to me other
than a few stupid teenage stunts and my pregnancy.
After I graduated
from High School I was a stubborn teenager who thought I knew it all.
After all I had a job so I was making my own money which meant that
I should be able to do whatever I wanted and what I wanted was to
move across the country. Now after so many years have come and gone
from that point, I have to admit that I was pretty stupid in doing
what I wanted by moving across the country. Honestly, I didn't learn
much in regards to my CMT but I learned plenty in what the real life
is really like and matured some in the year I was away from home.
After that year of some maturing I pretty much ran back home with my
tail tucked between my legs.
As I stated in my
last post that I stayed with McDonald's until I was almost 20, while
moving I was able to find jobs at McDonald's in the different places
I moved to. That didn't change when I came back home either for I
was quickly hired back at the same McDonald's I left when I ran away
in essence.
When I was 20 years
old I became pregnant, and that is when some interesting things came
into play. I had to first decide what I was going to do for there
were so many options and things to think about. I thought about an
abortion for only 20 minutes but couldn't commit murder of my unborn
child for this child didn't ask for me to play, so it wasn't fair to
make the child have to pay the piper. I thought about adoption but
that didn't seem fair to the child. That left only parenting my
unborn child, which I felt peaceful about doing.
The reason I
couldn't put my child up for adoption is because I knew that my child
had a 50/50 chance of developing CMT, and who better to raise a child
who might have CMT than someone who has it. My life up until I made
my decision to parent my child may not have been filled with things I
wanted to do but physically couldn't, but it wasn't the end of the
world either. I figured and hoped that I could be the positive role
model in my child's life like my Dad was to me, whether or not my
child ever shows signs of the CMT. If my child developed it them
maybe I would be able to help my child get around the uncertainty,
anger and everything else that might pop up.
I decided that even
though I was surprised by being pregnant I just wanted to be able to
take care of my child on my own without having rely on the state for
more than the health insurance. I continued working after I found
out that I was pregnant but sadly for only a few months for some
unexpected, and unknown complications popped up in regards to my CMT.
I didn't realize that the hormones caused by my pregnancy would
wreak havoc with the CMT but it did and oh boy did it ever. I
worried for I was falling a lot more and loosing the fine motor
skills that I had in my hand so I did what I had to do and quit I my
job. Little did I know that it was the hormones for after I had my
child things with my CMT reverted quickly to where I was before I was
pregnant. This is the only time that I heard about CMT ever
reversing.
As I said I had to
quit my job and I really did not like that for I hated the idea of
going on welfare simply I was not married and about to become a
single parent. Welfare has never had a good image, but I didn't want
to be just another number of lazy, baby making women who thought that
the world owed them something for I never thought that the world owed
me a single thing, but what else could I do? I was beginning to fall
at work and at home, but because I worked around ovens, stoves,
grills and fryers it was pretty dangerous for me to continue working,
so I had to think of my unborn child above all else. It was a pretty
simple choice when it came down to it for I choose between thinking
of my pride by not going on welfare or put my unborn child's safety
ahead of my pride by going on welfare.
When I made the
choice for welfare I also decided to take full advantage of
everything that I could so I could quickly get off of it again and
never have to go back on to it. The programs I planned on taking
advantage of were ways to help pay for higher education, child care
and cost to help with transportation, programs basically intended to
be taken advantage of to make life better for those who had the
willingness to try and desire for that better life. I also decided
to take advantage of having health insurance. Since I didn't know
about the hormones affecting my CMT yet I was seeing a decline in the
symptoms I figured I better just go for an over all health check
including seeing what was going on with the CMT.
While pregnant I
started making plenty of decisions in regards to my health, after all
I was to become a parent soon so I had to make the choices that would
be best for both myself and my child. I also learned that I couldn't
just forget, ignore or put off caring for my CMT. The words of one
doctor, shortly after my diagnoses, told my Mom and me that I would
be in a wheelchair by the time I was 25 years old, and with a child
coming I couldn't really ignore all that was happening any longer. I
know I had met with doctors throughout my teenage years who refuted
that doctor saying no doctor could predict that but it was always in
the back of mind, so I had to start taking better care of myself.
After my son was
born things changed, for my CMT reverted to about where I was before
I became pregnant but I still planned on seeing a neurologist and
orthopedic any how. Though things were better for me with the CMT I
decided that it would be best regardless for me to continue with
seeing the doctors to get an idea about what was happening with the
CMT and if there was anything that needed to be done for the CMT,
such as surgery, before I went on with my plans for schooling. I
didn't want to start schooling then pause everything because
something needed to be done and it would take a while to get back to
school. I was taking things just one step at a time and I didn't
want to take any backwards steps either.
In a few days come
back to hear how those doctors appointments went for some life
changes happened and all in regards to my CMT. Thank you for reading
my posts and learning more about what it is like for me to live with
CMT.
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